Rickit B Ganess / Blog

Who I Am

I am just me. I write depressing things and I cry all the time. I fall for people and never really get back up after the fall. Just lay there on the ground waiting for someone else to pick me up. My heart usually hurts after a huge fight and it will throb in my chest for days at a time until I finally feel okay. I hate my parents because they really don't understand a thing about me. I can't be happy no matter how hard I try. I try everyday to be happy. I am truly happy when someone gives me the reason. I love that I am alive, but there are the occasions where I just wish I was dead and could be buried. I know that is something I shouldn't wish for since my life isn't so bad. I give up on things that I should hang onto but I get scared and don't want it to get lost. I lie to a lot of people to make them think I am okay and in the end it gets thrown into my face. I don't like to talk after a huge fight because I want someone to notice that I am not okay. I feel like I am unnoticed sometimes or not pretty enough but someone always tells me a different story. But they usually are a friend. If someone wasn't my friend and told me I was pretty that would be nice. But I wish for things that will never come true. So that is who I am. A crazy hormonal crazy feeling teenage girl.