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In the years that I have been writing songs and trying to get my music out there, I have experienced many ups and downs. I've received my share of rejection and sometimes no response at all. What I have made it a point to focus on, however, are all of the resounding yes' and the positive feedback from listeners. If I actually believed at any moment in some of the most hurtful things that have been said to me about my music and my appearance, I would have quit years ago. Instead, here I am, writing this blog, having accomplished things that those people claimed were out of my reach. What I have discovered about myself is that the only person that could ever really prevent me from doing anything big or small, is me. So, my advice is to completely forget about the negative comments and people, listen and act on positive suggestions and ALWAYS act. Negativity is like dirt on a window; you won't see out of it clearly, until you clean it. So, use this #Method and clean your window so you can shine!
O.K. So, life hasn't been at all boring. There are twists to everything that is going on. Makes me wish I knew what to anticipate as outcomes to everything I wonder about, but that would be a pretty flat life. The latest song I am working on is called, "What About Now" I have it half completed. I was distracted and couldn't finish it but I will tomorrow. It's about the injustices that have happened to everyday people and the power to end injustice so the future is a better one. People get so wrapped up in the idea of time. Because of that, alot of people get wrapped up in themselves. Greed, envy and all kinds of nasty traits surface to the top. Time is something that we all say we wish we had more of. If only we could all realize that we could have more time if we stopped worrying about "the hurry".
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He told me that he used to go to church with his parents on Sundays and that he was an alter boy. He told me about his parents being good loving people, who taught him about how to be a good man and to love GOD. That's why I wrote the part in the song "the last time I looked at a Bible, was when my parents passed away."He started to drink at age 12 right after his parents died. I think that beats him up too. Because he sees himself as a bad person, unworthy of anything good. That is the reason I wrote "I'm the farthest one from Holy, I put a brick up everyday" because he is purposely putting a distance between GOD and himself. He doesn't feel as if he deserves love or any kind gesture from anyone including GOD.The Chorus part came to me like a vision. Almost like a movie clip. I felt like I could envision him kneeling down on one knee, with his elbow pressed against his other knee and his hand cupping his forehead begging GOD for help, feeling like he couldn't do it all by himself, feeling like he wants to but can't. I felt his yearning to want to fight and to actually take that first step but he needed help. So I wrote "Lord, there's something that you're asking, I'm not strong enough to do but if I try to take a step, would you promise to take two."The last verse of the song was written to demonstrate the build up and sense of urgency to change things in his life or else have another tragedy but this time it's someone else who is crying and feels cheated For this part, I was very skeptical to actually keep it in the song or ever play it to anyone because I wrote it without any inhibitions. I felt it was a bit too dramatic and people would think it was odd but as it turns out, people relate to it.The verse is about this guy going to bed one night and having a dream but it's a premonition-a warning about what's to come if he doesn't stop his addiction. While he is having this premonition, from above, he can see his family and friends standing outside of a church and he's confused as to why they are crying and upset. He doesn't understand what he's seeing and then he sees the cemetary where there are his friends and family again but this time gathered again around a tombstone and casket. He is trying to see who it is they are there for. He feels sad that he can't console them and take away their pain. He hasn't realized that the reason that he can't be there is because he died. When he wakes up he realizes that the dream was a warning and that GOD does love him-Jesus never did leave his side, that's was his second chance. He decides that he is going to change and no matter how hard it is-that with GODS love in his life he can dot! "I guess I'll take the road less traveled, and I'll pay up all of my dues" (meaning he wants to live out his Karma here on earth instead of facing the uncertainty of his soul when he stands before GOD. He will liev life making up for lost time and all the pain he caused people along the way). Maty
The answer to those questions for him was found in his past. At a verry early age, he had experienced the loss of his brother and his parents (one right after the other).He watched his brother get struck and killed by a car when he was little boy. His brother and him were playing football out near the side of their house when a DRUNK DRIVER came down their street and hit his brother. Shortly after that traumatic event in his life, both of his Parents passed away (one right after the other). What he had left were the memories of his family being together. His life was full and complete at one time and now it was missing people that he should have had in his life. Changes happened quick and suddenly for him. He had to move out of the town that he knew as home and relocated far away where he could be raised by his older sister. To this day, he praises her for the unselfish act of raising him. He admitts he was not easy to handle but she understood him.He told me once about how he reminices about the life he had before the accident.
I wrote the melody first on my guitar. Originally, the song was about something completely unrealted to addiction. I already had words/lyrics written out for the melody, but something just didn't feel right. I felt as if the melody was a gift but the words/lyrics felt as if I forced them down on paper.I tried to like it but it just din't feel right. I remember getting a fustrated because I had this beautiful melody but no words. I thought to myself, "How could I be going through writers block, when I just wrote this melody!" When I write a melody first, I have to feel it and write lyrics that for me compliment the feeling I get from the melody.So, I remember hollering up to Sharlena about my music conflict and my agitation with what was happening.She reminded me about something we had read on ASCAP.The article talked about how songs that tell a story are most appreciated by the listener.I tried to think about something that I could write about that actually was a true story. I thought about a very close friend of mine who battled with addiction to alcohol and I also thought about my relative who has the same addiction. I knew that was what fit to the melody. I cared enough about it and the people to be inspired to write about it. I immediately started writing because I was in tune to the whole idea and I didn't want to lose my mojo."I've been drowning in the bottle for far too many years"was a line about the feeling of sinking because of the drinking and the pity you know you're having for yourself. The song was inspired about the man I know who carries guilt about not being around as a father in his daughters life. I pulled inspiration from trying to think about how he felt, how addicts view the world. I thought about why he felt the guilt that he did. He told me that alcohol addiction is the reason that his daughters mom and him didn't stay together. His need to take the blame is huge but it's so different from taking responsibility.I thought about what made him and other people I know turn to alcohol. Were they trying to numb the pain? Was it a matter of guilt? Was the alcohol giving a sense of freedom from suffering? Was it something that they couldn't control?
First of all, when I write a song, it's not because I sit down with the intention to do it. There are several ways that the urge for me to write will happen. I have been known to dream about a song that I never heard before and then I know I am supposed to write down the words that I can remember and then find the melody on my guitar. Sometimes, when this happens I get up in a rush to record the meolody and write the words down and I lose it. "Somebody" was written that way also and "What's Killing Me." And just so you know, it's not like I dream up all of my songs because I don't. The other thing that happens is that I will doing something and all of a sudden a melody pops up in my thoughts and I rush to get it recorded and or written down. I recently wrote this really cool indian like theme that way. Another way a song will come to life is when I am messing around playing guitar and it just comes togther or I will write about what I see around me-like how people react/handle things or don't. I analyze everything and process it so that I can make sense of people and life. Sometimes I'll be driving in my car and just thinking and all of a sudden I think of phrases that come togther so good that they should be part of a song and then I'll build the song around that. I have definitely been inspired to write by hurt, but I have also been inspired to write by being loved and by loving. A little fantasy doesn't hurt either. Maty
My Songs will be available tp purchase in a few short weeks! You will be able to purchase them from this sight or iTunes, Napster, Amazon and more. I have worked very hard to get to this point in my music career and I am very excited to share these intimate songs with you. Most of my songs are written from personal experiences and a few are written about observing people close to me. When you purchase my "Take Two" Album or any of the 4 songs included, you are enabling me to get back into the studio to finally professionally record some of the other songs that you have heard before on raw acoustic and newer material you have yet to hear. Thank You for your support and I look foward too hearing from you. Look for lyrics to the songs and the stories behind the music. With much Love, Madalyn Maty