Trichotillomania / Blog

3, 2, 1, disembark! löschen Sie Ihre Dosen

I have to ask why somethings.folks//ideas have proliferated as virus of style. WHITE GUYS: PLEASE ACCEPT THAR YOU ARE NOT BLACK RAPPERS FROM "THE HOOD", WHEN THE SUBURBS HAVE PROTECTED YOU AND GIVEN YOU SOMETHING THAT PERMITS YOU "CARTE BLANCHE" IN AMERICAN SOCIETY...YOU ARE FOOLS IF Y0U ARE PRETENDERS. IF YOU KNOW ANYTHING YOU KNOW WHO ARE NOT PRETENDERS: IT JUST TIRES ME BEYOND ALL BELIEF THAT IT IS soimehow NOT ok for people to just be themselves, to NEED the prototype to be attached to. Hip hop, nor ANY other musical form is the "END ALL BE ALL" ......we had jazz: sophisticated amazement; but do we settle for repetitive Hhip=Hop that ONLY rarely gives a person amongst its' rank who is talented beyond that which ANYBody would call average. I (Nick) hope to release the proceeds of a project with a Hip-Hip artist within the next few; but it was after listening to more than I can count. He somehow heard our work, I heard his: it fit. For the two or 3 of you who read this: chgeck it out. It'll be promoted one way or other. There will likely be another promo for a free DL of another track to boost those who'll see our adverts. for our LP. Later, --NGP

I kinda hate you perfect model douches.

You've had this and that, You have worked (what is ACTUAL WORK) I am going fucking blind: so fuck you, pretty-boys...realize how stupid-easy your lives are. ;,.....Hatred, Malicontentedness: HELL YES! I believe it may be necessary for a "glut" of people, "surrounding me: my thought...my safety and central decision-council position-ship...) We must obtain (after the proverbial 'shit goes down'....) Coast Gurard Cutters: they are nearly unsinkable. If we needed to stay on the ocean for, even months, a year+ a bit would be capable of handling the roughest of seas that would be survivable by any vessel but a submersible made of Tungsten. Coast Guard Cutters are what we need..specially outfitted with idlke-tide engry-collection...solar that is water-ptoof, an ENTIRELY WATERPROOF SYSTEM of batteries and all else. It would buffer all occupants from disease and also, to the best degree possible (es. if we had bothered to obtain the right meds. prior to leaving port. We need guns. Lots of guns wer this to occur. It is unfortunate that there are too many weapons to be had in/on the west coast of the U.S......

Civilization will survive almost despite what is the catastrophe possibly happening at the end of this year. The planet is simply AT CAPACITY: there are many dying a day to , vainly...as in futility: there must be, for the projected Water Wars to not occur: MANY must die in the projected zones. It is not my wish that people who most certainly are of value in some way: EACH AND EVERY....not to mention that out of a given number of people: there is...as per X number of births...an Einstein of his or her era..

MY eyes are really geting bad, yau'll...... If there is a gap in my shit posings..........I'm either waiting for/getting surgery (lser corrective) on meine eyes. Cheers.....ZIt is a condition that one bears in mind that I ma insane

Dis_logic, Ill-may, anti-solvent, crazed pissed and riled today

Many elements of my life are poised to change REALLY soon. Most, as it is intended and should be, inevery way.., a very positive change. It will not be EASY for such a transition to occur: I am confident, however, that ALL is in the right place..has the right position,. etc; for this to be a successful major change in life. I look forward to losing any true connection with the shittown I was forced by greed to become a resident of. I, as it happens, would never have become that which I am were I not uprooted in a disrespectful, horrifically traumatic [it is a widely accepted fact that moving is second in trauma only to the death of a loved one..and that is when you WANT to move] move that took me from ALL I knew, and transplanted me into a room..., pardon me..1/6 of a room, with a naked geriatric man walking in without knocking, as it was his study/nag-free chamber that got taken from him due to my OTHERs', actions (wealthier parties actions who wanted to doubly fuck my and my moms' life up whilst getting a nice chunk of change in the process. Everyone is dead....but I have to vent. I hurt nobody directly, ...I WAS hurt, traumatized...without a fucking friend on earth for around 2 years: Oh yeah..not to mention getting beaten on a regular basis because I am white. They'd knock me down, etc...I'd call them "fucking retard wetback"!, I'd get up, they'd knock me down again, ""Pinche Maricon", on the ground again, get up, spit at them, knocked down again...(this kind of scene played out from mid-4th grade until about 8th grade when my personality and its' manifestations became a frightening thing to these cocksuckers. To speak much more could be self-incriminating/ none of your business for starters. Who do some people think they are. IS THERE ANYTHING WORTH $115 for 20 minutes of??? I can think of some crazy shit that would cost that.....but nothing conventional....except for my tomorrow bloody morning. DAMN! Value is the query: is /what is worth that?

Using a nail to hammer a hammer through a Glamour-raid

Firstly; to the few people who read this, I want to thank everyone who has begun following the band on twitter: it is very kind of you, and we hope to "do you proud" with our work now and in the future. It is hard to explain the precise feeling of gratitude one feels when presented with the knowledge that other people appreciate your work; a thing you would do if nobody else heard it save for those involved in its' creation. For many musicians, and artists in general.., myself certainly included, one can essentially get physically ill in a way (it is more of a depression driven by the cynicism, or negative emotions that seem to build when you don't engage in that ONE therapeutic thing that makes the world "re-align" for you..and for each and every...that thing is obviously different. Just know we REALLY give a shit that you like us...I never even thought I could literally know of 500+ people who like our music; this is where online marketing/distribution of an electronic release comes in: it is possible for the fan to be VERY close to the artist now; as opposed to when the musician was an untouchable figure 100,000,000 miles away from the lowly fan. Now a fan is sitting next to their idol on a nonstop flight from L.A. to Perth. 𝄞 And the fanboys and fangirls sing, "Doo, doo doo, doo doo doo, doo doo"𝄞 It seems like everywhere the British went during their Imperial days is now REALLY 3rd world....like, just awful and abysmal. They got offended, and went and left places...and, on their own; well third world nations all have certain, unfortunate things in common; as do the places in which we have intervened with "Police Action" India.. all of the elements..including the caste system: people oddly seemed, largely to accept this prior to a certain point without complaint. Were one born shit, you'd die shit: such was YOUR lot in life...your children will be shit: but since YOU will be reincarnated as something/someone else based on your worldly actions...; if oyu don't kiss the collective asses of those born "closer to god" than you....you are tainted with bad karma and are reduced. I wish I had a better understanding of all of it: I have the impression that lest one is born in india...it is next to impossible to understand the "unofficial" caste system that apparently exists to this day.. I would love to hear from someone in India regarding this question. It is apparent that imperial interests are what now comprise many of what we call "third-world" nations are former colonial interests that have been abandoned....along with the rich European nations helping all the "indiginees" , for what is seemingly a formula-derived length of time that is JUST long enough for the people of X, Y or Z Colonized nations' natives to become FULLY dependent on their European "custodians". Then said state plunges into a den of trash, hovel-housing and seemingly ENDLESS amounts of children under 4 picking through giant piles of feces EVERYWHERE. Were we to believe X-tian Children's Fund 'mercials we'd think that, from space, you'd zoom in and see, in places in Central or South America [notice that they NEVER name exactly where they are....they just show some non-descrript "brown" children who very well could be from the Americas, or Somewhere in The Indonesian Islands, a Pacific Islander of ANY sort, an ethnic Hmong, an Ethnic Albanian, one of a place the French or Spanish colonized that included Basque blood, Siberian, Mongolian,....I wonder how many kids were up for that role: "Wanted: a child whose look is 100% universally ethnically ambiguous...a child that could looked at and believed to be of whatever origin one was told. I think this deserves an experiment that I most certainly will perform if I have the funds to spend for the sake of what I consider to be nothing less than art..., but also science. I'm already blind.

People are people, and that kinda sucks.

Disappointment in the human conditions' magnified flaws. Mine are most certainly included in what I now roll around my mind, Some people are shit &: this is a given....however; it is especially shitty when a person rides the death of someone else into a small amount of money, or a large..but even more petty as to the specifics. Someone bites their "Big one" and has their family (usually just the dick-head-at-arms).... Well, what do you think...is it appropriate to ask people to simply DEPOSIT MONEY IN YOUR ACCOUNT IN LIEU OF FLOWERS.. WHAT THE FUCK! Never in my life have I EVER heard of or soon an obituary with so ballsy (in the worst way) request. Neither has anyone I have spoken to regarding the issue. What is DONE is a TRUST is established to help support the CHILDREN, primarily. The ignorant make me ill. It is simply disgusting. It is Lois Capps riding Walters' coffin like a Bobsled directly into office.(except that she has done a really good job; maybe Walter wouldn't have) This sole item prevents me from attending a close friends' memorial service, as I cann't leash my tongue. I have gotten in FAR more trouble for saying what I mean than I EVER have been in for LYING. Take a wild guess what that says to me and anyone like me: It is more likely you'll get in "trouble" by telling the truth than you will by lying and doing so completely and always. I hate human beings; particularly those with no class and nothing but self interest in EVERY situation. The money deposited will, quite simply, end up in the local Indian tribes' accounts, as it will..NO DOUBT, be largely gabled away. I quite honestly don't give a shit what the earthly consequences of my words are; some of you may know what, specifically, I speak of (yeah..., all of 2 or 3 people ever read these fucking entries EVER, so fuck it) I feel I am honoring his memory by expressing to the "world" my disgust at this....I feel he'd want me to be me, and the way he was: outspoken and brutally honest when it matters....and this matters. I am simply disgusted to a degree that has robbed me of the capacity to p"pay my respects" and that makes me very angry. That, this....I have shed more tears by several degrees of magnitude (exaggerating.., but you get the point,) than I did when my own father died. I cried for 10 seconds and then not 1 tear was shed for a lot of years. I hope things that are not possible. I would hope to get to continue to know the kid I met when he was barely as tall as my waist and now stands taller than I do at 6 feet....I'd like to because I lost my dad at the same age, roughly..., ..I would like to know the little girl who I saw nearly newborn, babysat more times than can recall and was humbled by a 3-year-old who could effectively trick me 100% (a situation where she was hiding from me...and I couldn't find her...when I did, she was wearing her Dads' smile..."Ha ha, I gotcha"! ...I nearly had a Heart attack. I will not be in this area for very long now...I am gone soon...so very soon...and I thank "insert here" that I finally get to leave this forsaken place.

to tell the truth: or to pose

I listen to music...my "peers", if you will. I look at statistics....I wonder why something that is quite literally the exact same damned things as the last few who DIDN't listen: just want ot cross-promote. If you were not "fanned-back" (it takes me a few days/a week, to sometimes get to a new artist) but.., the rule applies that, if I see/hear NO merit in the music...I DO NOT FAN. Luckily this doesn't happen too often. I think I simply expect more from people tan to be carbon-copies of other crap that I hate. There is not a single genre of music that has no merit, in my opine: however; the glut of rappers (and wannabes) who do nothing but wax pathetic about "ho's", money, diamonds, cars, selling drugs....I'm sorry,; its' just fucking pathetic that those "artists" can't think of ANYTHING else to have as a subject/style.. And, please...DON't pretend you are hard, tough, etc....such are the words of absolute douche-cowards: I.e. you have to prove how 'hard' you are: let it be and just admit you are from the damned suburbs. Hip-hop has unfortunately provided a bunch of upper-middle-class kids a venue in which to pose as if they are NOT boring, white and talentless (not everyone is meant to be a musician or artist of any kind). Poseurs, please piss off. If you are just starting, are honest, are genuine, etc....I have no problem with you: however (this is hypothetical entire: if someone comes at me claiming to be the best fucking rapper in the world..are "rapping" about stacking Gs and Pulling Hos, Rolling in their fucking Rolls Royce, Have a fridge full of Cristal, and how you've been running from the cops for sling rocks...etc...and you are from any one of the toilets around the nation...lets say, Minot, North Dakota....it is obvious you are a lying, in-genuine sack of shit. I am heartened to hear artists/bands like Dirty Bliss playing, well..Dirty, but just great, balllsy music..great riffs, just sincere. I have no issue with Hip-jop, as I've been a fan most of my life; however, it (since I know a decent amount about most forms of music) is easy for me to tell an untalented hack from someone who has "that something" that makes a good M.C. It disgusts me that some people think they can just "be a rapper"....it 's as difficult a thing to master as any instrument, and maybe more difficult at its' highest levels. Please....just be REAL....and when you are in a "fantastic moment"...make it obvious in someway.. --NGP

God, why is it so easy for 'em

it becomes exactly what it is: hilarious: I, me, meinself now have tastes that align with that to which the record-buying public over 18 about to my age ...it tastes of a complete cycle ending. I will attempt to illustrate: I essentially had no many influences as a musician that there was no place, initially to go but into another's territory: specifically, and admittedly, Aphex Twin. When we became a duo, ...things shifted (rightfully) to my roots in , as a literal child from ages 3-8 or 9 I was inundated by metal that my older sibling listened to.,....s mentioned before: I was 7 years old, and due to the influence of my babysitter, David...I bought my first "album" on cassette: "State Of Euphoria" by Anthrax. I soaking that album in like a drug or water one desiccated. ....I realized that my love of thrash metal ignited my love of punk-rock.., and more importantly: the punk ethic (in broad terms) I can only speak for myself.....and obviously, difference in "end disparity" is the recipe. Not a necessary recipe, but certainly the case regarding new work, recent work. Anyhow....I have no confidence, really, in a thing at the moment.... If it isn't a bother....get your friend to 'like' us, fan us, etc...those w/ the right taste...etc. Do us a solid.. Much Obliged in Advance, --Nick

present air pressure is eqivelent to drivers in this town.

watching a film recently made me think about a specific element of police in pursuit of citizens in vehicles. The EPA, etc., have set mandates for, in CA at least, when fully electric cars MUST occupy roads; in this film: the only cars on the road that ran on gasoline were the Police and other "authoritative" conveyances....which, by design of the electric cars (in the film....and until someone lets me drive their Tesla Roaster [WINK, WINK, Nudge, Nudge...i.e if you have one or access to one: let me drive it for an hour with you...I'd be eternally grateful and..shit; if you have one (A Tesla Roadster...I will personally get and send a free copy of everything we release, ever to you. ...the s2000 could be a thing I could just save up for, and buy a used one in great shape for less than the price of an OLD Kawasaki Ninja....why'd I give you as much for something I could just HAVE as MY vehicle, if I so desired, quite easily, in relative terms, of course. Upon the decision the start a family....MY vehicle, so to speak, will likely become something with more space, but just as efficient; however, I KNOW I speak of my hatred of driving: it is true to a degree...but, behind the wheel of a friends' Vintage Corvette; a friends friends' Porsche, a very souped up Eclipse, etc....I have grown to enjoy getting to drive a manual transmission...I think that is the difference. An automatic (unless it was the automatic 'Vette I refer to ) have so little feeling of connection to "driving". I enjoy the "simple act" of driving when I am shifting gears, watching a Tachometer, making each shift more perfect than the last, feel ing connection as if my bare feet were on terra firma...I even kinda loved the dangerous feeling of trying to get up to speed in time for freeway driving in my SHIT 88 Dodge Colt (Mitsubishi) hatchback...a 4-speed, with NO "get up and go at all...however; once I learned its' idiosyncrasies....I had fun driving, because of the shifting and having such DIRECT control over my engine. WITHOUT A DOUBT: the reason I dislike driving is because people in Santa Maria, CA DO NOT KNOW HOW TO DRIVE!!!! I have seen people do things I'd NEVER though I'd see someone with a license (unfortunately, that is ONLY an assumption in this bloody town). I realize that, in the end...my love of punk came, somehow, through my very early (3 or 4 years old initially) to Heavy Hetal...Judas Priest, Iron Maiden, ...there was a family friend who babysaqt me afterschool because my dad was an unreliable drunk.....I'd go to Davids' house. He introduced me to Thrash Metal...and, at age 7..the year my parents split..I bought Anthrax's "State Of Euphoria". I still have the original tape..but it was listened to to the degree that it is now damaged. I devoured every detail of that recording and, via my love of metal (I was a HUGE fan by that time of Ozzy's solo work, especially the first 2 with the incomparable Randy Rhoads. I consider him to be a "Guitar Hero" of mine. I quite literally; with regard to some...I have no choice (it is at my own peril otherwise), but to believe that their electric signature : their brilliance was called to another place because they were needed). When things happen for no apparent reason (when an end result is something that can be amongst the set of very obviously possible outcomes of a situation, or "Long in the coming", so to speak, as in that which could be paralleled witht hat of a terminal illness/situation. It feels the only way, aat least right now, tjhat I can rationalize the losses of friends and family...not just due to death, but due to their ability to live as liars. (I speak only about one person in this regard,,,...it matters not who: They are not capable/permitted to interact with yours' truly. Flatliners and Jacobs' Ladder were weird flicks

too many subjects for a line

I have nothing to say except that I have nothing to say. My life hurts at the moment. No reason....it makes everything less tolerable..., rather intolerable. I am intolerable to myself as is everything around me.. It went from 70+ degree F to raining too quickly...I think I hear thunder, but my ears are congested. Jurgen Proctow, or whatever his name is is a simply strange actor. There is a strangeness that goes far beyond the look, accent, etc. I guess it is just a German thing. Americans don't walk with proper posture much of the time...not really the case with Germans (at least what I glean from being of 90% + German genetic stock; having plenty of stories of "The Old Country". told to me.

It seriously (don't think my words a reaction against anyone T ALL...I JUST HATE HOW SOME PEOPLE...NO MATTER THEIR LEVEL OF "CELEBRITY.., some folks ned to get told Like the back of a lead hand coiming at 300=-PSI.

It is SIMPLY a bitch move to fan someone and then make yourself inaccessible (fan or artist...mostly fan, as we artists barely have the time (if you knew how often I am falling asleep while writing these BLOGs due to sleep deprivation due to trying to get more folks to hear us and our work and be ready to pre-order our upcoming full-length LP (if you buy the other two releases, you ge what amounts to an EP of new songs as well as supporting Independent Artsts ....don't you get it: we want to give you free stuff!! come on! don't be so damned tight with an electronic representation ol you that took 30 minutes to create: I mean,,,....come on,,!

I don't think there is a poerson who should be beyond reach.,...not a one person anywhere. If you interact..as in inject your thought.,...you must be prepared to take and defend people who have problems with oyur position...not agreeing, but had you worded it differently: though those email, blogging against your posts may not agree...they, wil without doubt, admire a properly prepared argument. EVERYBODY DISAGREES....and to pull a cliche..."the World would be a boring place if everyone were the same".. There is too much room to bleed credibility from bands/artists who have not bothered to care what their audiences may have wanted:...they did what they needed to do as musicians. I try to only watch television when there is something on that 1. really entertains me, 2.is very interesting/informative/3.to see good live musical performances when tyhey rarely are played, 4. exposure to various films I would never have seen......I just saw a Van Halen video, likely their newest (w/ "Diamond Dave" back again...never thought I'd see the day Hell froze over: but , they suck...they are old, irrelevent, writing shit, hokey 80's party-metal. Fuck Van Halen.: and I like FUCK, which many people hated...but I was used to 1984, etc....classic Van Halen...I still thought FUCK was a good record, though..even as much as I hate Sammy Hagar, was in great voice on that album. What I have just seen proves to me that they should have given it uip when Hagar left the last time; actually..when Gary Cherone was fired/l;eft, whatever the story....they should have called it a Career. Hubris is a motherfucker; apparently..

just ramblings about stuff...what we need, what will be released

To make the voice clear, as we all imagine someone narrating, in a way, while reading....so if you know what my speaking voice is, or can extrsapolate from my voice on the tracks...you can know that this is Nick. Thank You for having a listen and liking what you heard enough to "like" us, or become a fan, so to speak. We started as just me, became a 2-person collaboration, is about to be rendered into a live-band configuration along with the rest of our electronics (somethings may get very oblique on the new record) I heard something regarding Garbage 2.0 and he fact that MOST, according to them, of what sounded like guitars were synths, and what were sounding like synth were simply highly "treated" guitars. I know that it already applies to some sounds on songs released; it will certainly play a large role on our upcoming full-length release, "Up, Down, Charmed And Strange"..., we will release this on 180 gram Vinyl, CD and Digitally. Each release will have a separate set of extra tracks: each will contain a different set of 3 or 4. We may do more covers, but our cover of David Bowies' "In The Heat Of The Morning" will appear on the vinyl release. We, I suppose, will simply contact stores who may agree to take our records to sell, We will, obviously, let you know where our LP can be bought. If you represent a store, and read this...and are willing to carry our upcoming release......please let us know. We are in drastic need without any real idea as to how to conduct "real" business. We are smart....just inexperienced.