E. Barnes / Blog

Are You Available?

So I was sitting in the barbershop and out of the blue, I felt compelled to write something. I didn’t have anything specific in mind but the first thing that came to me was the question, “What is our life’s true purpose?” I mean really, what are we supposed to accomplish throughout our lives? Oftentimes we become complacent in our living and become accustomed to only “scratching the surface” of our existence. How do we break away from merely existing and really start living? I’m talking about the kind of living that is fulfilling day in and day out. The kind of living that effects not only us but also those around us in a positive way. Is there some sort of instructional handbook on life? Many would say the bible. I, being a Christian, would also give that as my first answer but what about for those that don’t believe in Christ? Are they out of luck? Should we force them to believe in the God that we believe in then suggest the bible to read afterwards? When our passions have dwindled from the very thing that pushed us every day, to things that we only occasionally reminisce about, what do we do then? What if those things (our ex passions) are no longer enough to make us make a miraculous turn for the better, to dig deeper, or to try harder? What if “looking inside of ourselves” no longer yields the results that it once did? When our confidence starts to plummet and everything about us is an uncertainty, who do we turn to then? God Almighty right? That’s the obvious choice for those that believe but again I ask, what about those that don’t believe in Christ? Some may suggest chanting positive affirmations that can be found in a quick google search. But what about when we (believers and non-believers alike) need a human being to audibly give a response to our cries for help? Will there be enough laborers available? Our true purpose in life is to serve (period). We were created to do this. But are we really taking God’s true purpose for our lives seriously? As believers in Christ, will we be ready to allow God to use us when a “real life” opportunity presents itself? When someone (regardless of their beliefs) needs to hear us say the very thing that will keep them from committing suicide or taking the life of another, will we be available? When someone has been diagnosed with an untreatable disease or is being tormented by depression, will we be available to say more than, “I’ll pray for you”? When something “real” needs to be said to get them through, will we be in tune enough to hear their heart’s cry? Will we be bold enough to speak a word powerful enough to resonate through whatever it is that they’re going through? So again, my question to you is, are we really taking God’s true purpose for our lives seriously? I too, am guilty of not taking God’s calling on my life seriously so in no way am I judging anyone. It’d be foolish of me to do so. As I mentioned earlier, I just felt compelled to write something. With that being said, my plea to you (and also the man in my mirror) is to do what it takes to become available.

I Almost Let Fear Win

Creating this project wasn't always in my plan. Approximately 2.5 years ago I wrote the song, “What Do You See In Me” simply because that was how I was feeling at the time. God was blessing me in a way that was almost baffling. I was confused how someone like myself could be blessed the way that I had been. I had an amazing wife, beautiful children, gifts, talents, and so many other things happening in my life that I wasn’t deserving of. With all of the “dirt” that I had done over the years, I wondered, “Lord, what do you see in me?” My mind begin to be flooded with thoughts of how God had always blessed me in countless ways despite the sinning, despite the inconsistency in my Christian walk, and despite the lack of reciprocity on my part in our relationship. I wrote that song (“What Do You See In Me”) and God spoke to my heart in an amazing way! It was like a light bulb went off. I thought to myself, “Why wasn't I using my musical gifts to give back to the one that had given them to me?”

From that moment, I did some soul searching. I wanted the lyrics that I wrote for my songs to uplift, to inspire, and to put focus on how awesome God’s love was! I stepped out on faith and dropped everything musically to create a full length album that focused on just that. To uplift, to inspire, and to place attention on the love of God would be this project’s focus. What Do You See In Me the EP is a collection of songs that I took from that full length project once it was completed (What Do You See In Me the Album Coming Soon!).

After the songs had been written and recorded, there was still a small problem. I was afraid! Afraid of how people who knew me when I was doing my “dirt” would react to this newfound “walk” of mine. Would they consider me fake for “trying to be all holy now”? Would the fact that I’ve written secular music be frowned upon? Would people even dig my sound? All of these thoughts ran through my mind on a frequent basis. This would be my very first release as an artist. Each song on the project is a representation of who I am musically, so again I was afraid. That was until, I remembered who my Father was. I knew that ultimately regardless of how afraid I was, if I pressed on God would get the glory. Even though the lane that I was currently walking in was completely new to me, I knew in my heart that I was where I was supposed to be. I knew that if I looked past the fear, the music would do what it was supposed to do. So every day I say, “Goodbye fear!”