We have released my new song, "Solace." You can find it at http://cdbaby.com/cd/bethballinger I've said enough about this song in previous posts. It is released and I am moving on...from this song and with my life. I hope it inspires you to do the same. Love, Beth
So I think we've finally got recording for 'Solace' wrapped up. Just about killed me to record that song. That was one of a couple songs I've written that just went straight from my head to paper and didn't change a whole lot after that. Every time I work on the recording for vocals I have to go back and remember why I wrote what I wrote.
Sidenote: something about musicians that I don't think people really grasp is that when we write personal songs, it's basically a page out of our journals. A piece of our heart. Music is a language all of its own - so to be a musician means that you communicate your feelings through music. You write your feelings down in this 'journal' and then hand it to the world saying, "Here you go - now judge me."
'Solace' is no exception to this rule. This song was written in response to a song my ex-husband suggested I listen to. The song he sent me was one written by a broken-hearted man who felt like he would never recover from his broken heart. I don't know if he sent it to me because he was (finally) starting to feel the pain of our divorce or because he thought it was a pretty song on piano that he thought I would appreciate it, but it prompted me to respond.
My separation shattered what I thought I knew about love, life, and the world. It made me question everything I thought was a sure thing and made me realize that the only constant in life is change. The only person I can truly rely on is myself. And in the end, I had to accept that all of these realizations were not bad - they are good. They gave me a renewed sense of empowerment. Enter 'Solace'.
As I recorded 'Solace' I was reminded of those first couple of weeks after my ex-husband and I separated and I broke down into tears. The lonely, empty feeling of just going through the motions, hoping to feel a little better the next day but knowing I probably wouldn't - those feelings all came rushing back. I remembered how I felt like it happened yesterday.
It was a state of being I never thought I would recover from but so desperately wanted to be rid of. After a month of this, I realized I really was starting to get better. I could see color again - the world didn't seem black and white any more. I made new friends. I started to enjoy everything again. I could breathe again. Now I have moved past the pain and created a brand new life for myself... and it's better than I ever thought it could be.
I wrote this song because I am not the only person in the world who has felt like this and I was just as shocked as anyone else that I was able to pull myself out of that and stand up. I want everyone else who feels this way or will feel this way to know that there is a light at the end of the tunnel. Take solace in knowing you'll breathe again. You will. I promise.
Ragamuffin was great! Thanks to everyone who came out - I had SO much fun. Ethan Smith had a great acoustic set, and of course Keltic Kudzu killed it. It was really a great night.
With Darling and Open Wounds about wrapped up for the album, it's time to start working on a few of the other songs as well as writing a few new ones! I'm still working on the one for Nick and Christina, but I do have some working lyrics. I think the title is going to be "Still Too Young." Back in the studio with Heber tomorrow to move right along!
On a personal note, my Kia Sportage finally tapped out. I am now the proud owner of a 2004 Volvo V70. Yes, folks - that's a station wagon. Holla.
I love it when I have one of those days where I’m just crazy inspired. I’m not sure what sparks it (although I know having a cup of coffee definitely helps), but I try not to ask questions and just enjoy the ride.
I had an awesome week. Finished up vocals for “Open Wounds” and “Darling” (check out the teasers on my Reverb page for a sneak peak), although I’m thinking I want to go back and do harmonies on the chorus for both. I definitely need to talk to Heber about that.
I also got to do a mini photoshoot with Deron Fish, which was SO fun. If you know me, you know that I’m really goofy and kind of awkward sometimes, but my photographer friends have always told me I’m photogenic. If I pay attention to the camera I end up with a goofy smile on my face, but if I pretend the camera isn’t there I look all… saucy. Apparently. Either way, it was a lot of fun. I have another photoshoot scheduled for April 6 and I’m really excited!
Another piece of exciting news – I’m opening with Ethan Smith for Keltic Kudzu tonight at Ragamuffin Music Hall! The show starts at 8 PM and it’s sure to be a great time. They have a beautiful piano I’m looking forward to jamming out on! Hope you all can make it out!
It’s been quite a week! Had a great show at Roswell Tap on Thursday – SO many people came out. It was a really great time. I’m really looking forward to being up there again on Tuesday for their singer/songwriter open mic night. The best part about Roswell Tap’s open mic night is sharing the stage with so many other great musicians – it’s always a fun night.
Yesterday was a productive day in the studio. Worked on vocals for “Open Wounds,” but we still have a bit more work to do on that. For some reason I just couldn’t get a few parts just the way I wanted them, which can be frustrating to say the least. Perhaps this is the nerd in me coming out, but I’ve been playing a lot of Dragon Age II lately and the other night I kept dying in the same fight. It was the same frustration yesterday. We did get a lot worked out though, so we did get some stuff accomplished. We also got some badass cello on “Open Wounds” and “Darling,” courtesy of rockin’ cellist Sarah Clanton Schaffer. She’s so freaking awesome. I’m so grateful we were able to borrow her for the evening.
Heber and I have a couple of new songs in the works, which I am of course super excited about. This album is coming along quite nicely!
So. Blogging. I like to write… this should come naturally, right?
Anyways… the album is moving along well. We’re almost done recording two tracks, one of which will be on the ‘Sounds of Roswell’ album (partnered project between Lucky Dog Studio and The Roswell Tap). I heard some of Poverty Level’s (http://www.reverbnation.com/povertylevel) track the other night for that album and they sound gooooood! But I digress. Like I said, almost done recording two tracks, have two more songs ready to start recording, and a couple songs in the works.
One song I am really looking forward to finishing is a song my producer Heber and I are writing for a friend that passed away. He was only 20 years old, and his older sister died in a car accident a few years back not much older than he was. The oldest sibling is a good friend of mine that I have known since we were very young. Like 5 years old. While I am quite terrible at consoling people (I just never know what to say), I told him what I can do is write a song for them. The working title we have is “Still Too Young” and it is coming together perfectly. I can’t wait to play it for their family.
R.I.P. Nick and Christina Wofford – Neither of you will ever be forgotten.