Jessica Lynn / Blog

Letting Go By Jessica Lynn Hepner

I sat staring out the window, into the darkness, Searching for some understanding, some peace of mind. Oh how I long for the comfort I once felt the feeling of belonging And the tranquility in life I now cannot find. I feel empty inside like a part of me is missing or maybe has even died. And with this anguish burning from deep with in, It's these bitter angry tears that I cry. The sudden realization that there is nothing I can do, - ever, Pounds in my head, chanting the song of a loser, - an involent. The ties that once held me to my Hope are now tangled around my throat, And they are chocking me with nothing but this pure resentment. Oh, if only I would have known, Such torment I could have saved this poor old heart from. If only I would have listened to what all the others had said, Long before all this mass destruction, was done. But, I am a fool of all fools, And I deserve only what I get. And staring out across what is now just The Ruins,' I know this I shall never forget. I took a chance, And then I watched it all come tumbling down. Shattering into a million pieces of What Might Have Been, Upon the ground.

This Prisoner By Jessica Lynn Hepner

Hold tight to this prisoner, And throw away the key, Denied the very essence of existence, Held unwilling in captivity. Shackled and chained, Bound inside this blinding pain, The tortured endlessly, Until I too, begin to go insane. There is no Hope which remains, And there is no Desire to strive. Each breath that I take is a battle in itself, For me to stay alive. Defeat stings bitter upon this broken Soul, But it’s the shame that conquers all, In The End. Dreams I once only dared to Dream, Have faded into the shadows of the pouring rain. My memories disappear into the growing mist, And there is no one but myself, to Blame. Now I have no place to turn, No where to go, and suddenly I am all alone. I am stuck where I have been for so long now, And all I really want is to go Home. But, I wonder, where is Home, Surely it cannot be where I once already died. The time for rebirth was near, or so I was told, But, it turns out that that, too, was a lie. Well the time for me has now come, Oh Glorious, glorious praise God, indeed. You see once only endure so much pain, Until they too run out of blood in which to bleed. So to the Angels I so wearily cry, Please set me free, Release me from this Life of Pain, And let this now become The End of me.

Mystic Moonlight Enchantment

Out into the Mystical Moonlight, Lurking amongst the half dead trees, My biggest fears have come to pass, And their bringing me to my knees. The not so silent echoes, Fill the damp and dreary air, I can hear the sounds of tortured cries, Which seem to be coming from out of nowhere. There are shadows upon the ground, Which deceive what little I can see. I thought I smelt recognition, But, my imaginations, once again, forsaken me. So, I continue to wander, alone and in silence, Moving but not really going anywhere. All because I have been un justifiably forbidden to ever move on, This burden I alone, must now bear. I guess I will never know, All the secrets this old heart has with held. Their long forgotten, - erased by the pain, Empty Empathy so viciously impelled. I beg and I plead, just to be set free, Released out somewhere amongst the evening mist, Where I can finally put all this behind me, And pretend they never really did exist. Written By Jessica Lynn Hepner

New Song

Yesterday I recorded "What If God Was One Of Us", and I really wanted to run through it one more time, but do to the fact that I was starting to Hemmorhage I had to leave to go get checked out at a local hospitol. Well all is fine, just need some rest and relaxation. Maybe in a day or two I will hit at it again. We'll see...

July 15, 2011

It is now 12:30 am, and I have completed the first step to this artist thing, I have been working on here and there. I had at the least 2 solid straight hours of uninterupted rehearsal time this afternoon, and it truly was grand. I could not ask for more...