Here's the skinny... Inspiration comes and goes with me.... sometimes I sit down to write a song, like the one I recently write for my cousin, http://youtu.be/XvqnxFQQw_4 , I sat down and wrote it in one straight shot. Sometimes I think i have the best idea EVER for a song... and, Nothing! It happens the same with blogging for me, I'll have a great thought and say "I should blog about that" too bad I am walking down Ponce on my way to work and away from all technology. So though few and far between, a blog there shall be... Here's a random thought to leave you with. Just because you're not the best at something, or the opportune moment isn't there that often, Oorr you're worried about if you make any sense. don't give up or not do it! It is NEVER too late! (that's my new motto) I write what comes outta my brain now... whatever it might be... feels more natural that way. Be who you are, forgetful, shallow, meek or douchey... Let it Be!....
...well douchey's no fun.. nobody likes douchey
Sometimes I wish the battles raging in life where more like the ones in all my favorite films. The struggle to survive life and jobs and plans and money might be easier if you where say... marching out to meet a pack of orks to save the future of middle earth. On some discouraging days it might be nice to be worried about what order to slice up the crazy 88 instead of if the rent will get paid. Followling my dream is a passion for me its like a battle for good and evil and Voldemort keeps kicking me in the face! For real though, everyone has something they are striving for or struggling to accomplish. So, chin up to all of us, cause the good news is... it maybe a tough journey but at the end of the day the emperor is fried chicken and the rebel alliance is getting its party on! We got this! so.... Live long and prosper!!!
I had a small epiphany. We are all a great big bloomin onion!! with layers, that are dipped, and then deep fried, and then dipped into spicy ranch. People are capable of feeling a lot of different things at once. We are layered, like Ogre's. I'm capable of being totally resolved and conflicted at the same time... maybe that means I'm crazy. I'm not quite sure, or am I. I said all this to say at the bottom line when we strip away the cool factor. You know, the cool factor? How success, certain clothes, car, accolades, or a pimp walk makes you feel untouchable. How some day's I feel awesomer (yes that is a word) than others. When I take it all away, I am a DWEEB, a dork, nerd, uncool. I've decided that all my crazy layers are good. There's no need to hide the embarrassing parts, the hurtful or dweeby parts. I am crispy delicious oniony goodness. As are you!! I may have rambled on this blog. Lets add that to my list I am a rambler, mild OCD, star wars lover, not too stylish, amateur musician, harry potter freak, indecisive, some times bitter, overly critical, regular girl. See not so hard. Be who you are, cause you're awesome and Ill do the same. And ALL the way too cool people will end up being lame. Hey! that rhymed... easily distracted... should have put that down too. :)
I find myself both excited for the future and a tad worried. Once again I'm starting over. New music new everything. I'm not searching for a gimmick or an image, which is nice cause everything about this new venture is just me. Yes, I should have had this 100% figured before I moved to Atlanta. However, the path of discovery sometimes can't be put on a time crunch. Maybe discovery isn't the word, maybe it's recovery. I see myself writing more of my own feelings and experiences. Rather than the vague "meh" stuff I had before. Not that it wasn't good. I just feel my connection is different. I wrote a song called "Easy Takers" about my frustration with this ambitious dream of mine. Some people just catch big breaks and its hard not to grow effing resentful! I mean I'm fine, good for them :) Then there's the song called "The Devil" about my recent past and how the choices I made to free my soul, (I know that's a dramatic way to say it... lol) some people gathered together out of certainty that it want me but a demon controlling my actions. A funny thought, i think. Any who, I used to over think this kinda stuff; lyrics, blogs, videos etc. I've decided now, the truth is much appealing even if it makes me look way lame. At least its me and nothing else. Ill be lame, I'm cool with it.