MT aka tzsfinest / Blog

A Uncomfortable Submission

Sitting here as I wash away my tears, Depression was an option made out of fear, Your voice in my head I can still hear, If you were far away then I was just near, Most of the time I’m just lost in thought, Time doesn’t matter anymore, the clocks stopped, Take my phone and throw it out the window, Come back and take me away from this limbo, Memories of you haunt me while I sleep, Unconscious Sleepwalking, tripping over my feet, Life goes fast, don’t let it pass you by, These regrets will have you looking back, asking why, I’ve had so many that I’ve lost count, Confusion, anger, pain and doubt, Lets take a moment to understand how I feel, Reality is gone, this life isn’t real, Sometimes all I need is a chance to regroup, Push the reset button, let the mind reboot, I live everyday like it’s the last, The armors gone and so is this the mask, Clean my eyes, wipe away the mist, Without these contacts, details dont exist, Trying to make sense of it all, Trying to catch my thoughts from the waterfall, Conceited is my swag but I’m just being me, Step into my footstep for a second and see what I see, Take a walk in my shoes, you might even a run, So that you might understand where I’m from, What I see on a daily basis, day in and day out, It’s no longer a mystery, it’s beyond any doubt, Quite is the night that I hold on to, Invisibility is a curse that shows through, Good and bad times all mixed in one bag, I give up, tell them to wave the white flag, Sitting in the dark, looking for the light, I’m not short but it’s beyond my height, I guess that was me just wishful thinking, Tragedy in my glass is what I’m drinking, Imagination disappeared when I was a little kid, So I never had an explanation to do what I did, I was living so spontaneous, trying to find a sign, But all I really found was the words on the line, The rain always pours on my downfall, And I threw out my phone so your number I cant call, Trying to hold back the drops falling from above, Just like I was holding back on relationships & love, See trust is sometimes that changes over time, Mines become quiet, like an outspoken mime, Playing with emotions, throw the dice, Pray for a good number, damn .. should have rolled it twice, Still gambling with evils intentions, Hate is a weakness built by aggression, That only shows at the worst moments of the day, Trying to hide that part of me, don’t know what they’d say, Scared of getting to close to my enemies, Don’t let them hack the code, get away from me, I tried to decipher what I’m meant to be, Dodging the bullet through this debris, The cave collapsed on me a long time ago, The flashlights running out, gotta take it slow, Blind are my eyes to what I wish I could see, Finally comforted by it all, let my mind free..

Write it Down

Writing down thoughts to pass the time, This lyrical diversity consumed in my mind, Should I talk bout today, tomorrow or right now?, Do I practice before hand or wait to make a sound?, Do I put a beat on and let the music play?, Or do I wait till’ the right moment to know what to say?, See I can’t sleep cuz’ these words I continually hear, And no matter where I am, the rhyme is always near, Open up this book and find a page to write, But I can’t find a space, more to my delight, Find another one and get this pen ready, Calm now Matt, let your hand become steady, Prepare to write what’s on your mind, Let these words come out, fill up every line, With the things that bother me, the issues in my life, My dreams or the nightmares I see at night, The struggles of my friends, the things that I fear, The questions I have or the answers I want to hear, What motivates me, the inspiration of thought? Music is all the keeps me from becoming lost, Cuz’ see all I need is my pen and my pad, No matter the mood, whether I’m happy or sad, Doesn’t matter the time, I’ll be writing forever, Through it all, my songs always keep me together, I call myself a poet to the rappers that I’m compared, The games played out, lyricistm is never heard, So I tell the truth no matter the cost, Lies consume the world when I have writers block, I’m just living my life one day at a time, Hopefully one day my dreams I will find, But until then, I’m just telling it as I see it, Writing bout life and checking off the list, My experiences control what I say, Telling the world how I feel with no delay, Not looking for acceptance, this music is part of me, Darkness is everywhere but these words help me see, The trouble is whether or not they can relate, Are they truly understanding or just listening by mistake?, Will they talk bout what I’m saying, how it makes them feel, Or will they ignore the true meaning of “keeping it real”, No matter what, it wont stop my pen, Cuz’ I write for myself, for my family and my friends,

Wordly Truths

Look at this world that we living, Trying to understand this pain that we giving, The judging of others so valued, Ignorance keeps going so blindness travels, Trying so hard to fill these selfish needs, That we start to not believe, So we start to plot and badly conceive, Reality waving goodbye as it turns to leave, Why are we so stuck to our devilish ways?, Why do we let these sins rule our days?, But no one wants to open their eyes to what’s going on, Sex and violence being mentioned in every song, They say “sorry, but innocence is no longer allowed”, And what’s with this uniqueness, you need to follow the crowd, So being yourself is now seen as a crime?, Society controlling the outcome down to a perfect line, Jump like this, talk like that .. the rules are drawn, But inside us all now, a rebel starts to spawn, We cheer for these politicians and applaud their greed, As the corruption takes over and starts to succeed, We watch from a far but let it continue to occur, As they dictate our lives using our own fears, All we can do now is survive this oppression, All we truly want is for this all to lessen, Give us back the things we value in life, Like originality, change, wrong and right, Forget this que, lets jump to the side, Drive around in circles, make an interesting ride, Because now, normality is something we cant relate, So much conservatism, that it just all seems fake, Patiently we wait and hope for a change, Hoping on a better day is all that keeps us sane, The media telling us only what it wants us to know, All our lives have become now is bullshit and reality shows, Now we trying to live out the things we see on MTV, Making fools of ourselves to an unremarkable degree, Talk shows taking control of every radio station, But they don’t want to hear your opinions, Because it’s about them and what they are saying, Rush Limbaugh continually telling us that what we think is wrong, Feeding us this conservative bullshit as we follow along, Don’t question the motives, just believe, Let them transcribe this life that we lead, Telling us what we know is right, is actually wrong, “you’re thinking for your self?” that just doesn’t belong, Walk to the same beat as everyone else in line, Doesn’t matter our occupation cuz’ now we are societies mime, Change is now become something so distant from us, Living the same day to day has become a must, Reading the news but never surprised, The same endless stories, the same endless lies, No longer thinking of the consequences that used to arise, Now everything is thoroughly prepared, No distant surprise, Revelations are disguised, Enemies have now become friends until things break lose, The government telling us which side to chose, As we support these campaigns that we know nothing about, And gracefully clapping our hands for the troops without a doubt, We cheer as the bombs go off and shots are fired, But through it all, this propaganda will never cease to tire, Feeding our confusion with every desire, Telling us who the enemies is with no evidence, But we don’t question it, no need for common sense, It’s all a delusion to hide their real intentions, So that we don’t have a reason for an intervention, Just following the path and letting things take shape, Letting our own ideas disappear to an unknown fate,

A Cold Day (Winters Poem)

Standing in the snow, its up to my knees, Yes I can feel the cold, I itch and I sneeze, I just want to move but in my path I'm frozen, Looking for the sun but its not showin, I can feel the sweat beneath 2 layer of clothes, I'm waiting for warmth to come back home, I'm coughing and wheezing through the wind, If the church was warm I would go to heat up my sins, sitting by the fire but the light will soon dim, gather more wood so the clothing I can trim, Winter has me in the grasps of its icy fingers, its only november but the cold already lingers, I want to sleep in my bed with 2 blankets on, I hibernate in my cave for the winter's long, I can feel the snow has its drips on my hoodie, lets move to the Bahama, who's coming with me, I'm on the sled going fast down the hill, if they did it for the chill, I did it for the thrill, As I fall, I roll continously through icy ground, Laying there heavily breathing, the cold surrounds, Get myself backup, I cant feel my hands, I walk back up that hill, the thrill commands, Nothing like a day in the snow with your best friends, yea, I had fun, Im glad this day I could attend,


See I know this girl, her name Christina, They way we talk makes me want to meet her, No matter what, she makes me laugh, If I’m having a bad day, she brings the smile back, She appreciates my music for what it is, Shows that my true fans really do exist, Talking to her while the night is late, See my troubles I feel she can relate, Sometimes I just need someone to talk to, Someone who keeps it real and speaks the truth, See all these other girls be playing with my head, But she makes me just laugh instead, Maybe we’ll party it up one day, Who knows, maybe soon because I gotta get away, A smile appears when a text from her comes up, It brightens my mood, brightens my night, Talking to her is like one of lifes delights, See it’s hard these days to find a girl who’s real, A girl who understands how I feel, One that I really enjoying talking to no matter the time, and one who asks me to make her a rhyme, Wish I lived closer to her cuz I know we’d have a blast, I prefer a girl who doesn’t have to try to make me laugh, When I’m talking to her, she ads some fun to my night, Had to tell them what it is, this song for you I write, I want to taste her cooking cuz I know she an expert chef, I’m sure if I taste it, it will be something I wont forget, I appreciate a girl who doesn’t hide who she is, Its Good to know that a girl like her really exists, When I’m sad she listen to what I have to say, She helps cheer me up without delay, I have to repeat it, this girl makes me smile, And one like her I ain’t seen in a while,

A Million Decisions and a Hundred Last Glances

Dear God, I don't know what to think anymore, Its becoming hard to come up, I just want the sins to disappear, Because life itself is what i fear, Doing wrong when I'm just trying to do right, Doing what I can do so I can sleep at night, I can't change what Ive done in the past, I'm going slow in a world thats going fast, Its hard when you trying to fulfill your dreams, I'm by myself even when I'm part of the team, Sweat and tears can blow a mans vision, My life being destined with many decisions, Trying to find myself in a world thats corrupt, There is a time when you say enough is enough, But for me Ive had my chances, A million decisions and a hundred last glances, They say breathe easy when they just don't know, What you've been through, when the bad times show, So hard, this hatred, i just can't see, Mind will drip for every pain Ive felt, Even with a million hands, my life cant be helped, I feel the grip of agonies fist holding me down, My enemies just start to circle around and around, Ive had enough to succeed at my own life, I feel that I am the darkness to an open lite, I am just stuck in my nightmare, Even to a ghost my life will scare, Jealousy and hatred are beyond my grasp, And like an empty pen my ink will not last,

Donnie Darko Poem

It's the same shit happening but its a different day, He sees his path in time but he walks away, He sees the chances before the choices occur, He sees visions at night but in the day He sees blurs, He stares into the darkness trying to see the light, He cant sleep in the day but he is wide awake at night, He does not dream with this black space behind his eyes, Reality is a nightmare that he cannot hide, His motivation is disappearing but he is not concerned, His life just keeps moving, the fire still burns, around every corner a certain fantasy creeps, His values are still there except for his belief, Living day after day with this misunderstanding, if only he could see what evil they are planing, He can feel the warmth but he pushes away the sheets, Winters touch in his fingertips, he cant feel the heat, Everyday is the same, nothing different ever happens, They succeeded in life, how is what he asks them, Show this light because the dark follows him in the day, And at night all the light suddenly goes away, His memories appear, he does dream of the past, Were he will go in the future he wish he could ask, The mystery will unfold as he turns the page in life's book, The fire is ablaze but the structure will not be shook, These emotions he feels; Love .... Pain .... fear, But in a distant of an emotion, a single world he cannot hear, Quiet, the silence is broken by a single drip, Mistakes happen in his life, to the pavement he sits, He wonders for tomorrow so that he can see today, Another pill he takes to make this reality go away, He questions his path and the things that he sees, For a single second in time he feels he can't breathe, If you look into his eyes, a white space is all that appears, No emotion, no happiness or a single fear, Time moves forward, the clock starts to click, As he ventures out to the world all he sees is a mist, He walks steadily with one foot in front of the other, He keeps walks, he hears the voices of his mother, He sees a world that he cares little about, He moves through the day, he moves without a doubt, Life's obstacles, he takes them for what they are, And in the sky he doesn't see wishes, all he see are the stars, He listens to the whispers, these voices in his head, But after the deed is done he cant recall what they said, He wants to shed light onto these things that he hears, But he keeps his mouth shut as the chances come near, He sits in his room with this daze in his eyes, For he can no longer see the difference between wrong & right, His heart moves a single jump & from the daze he awakes, He doesn't know what he did, the mystery of the night doesn't fade, He doesn't know where to go so in that path he stays still, The wound is open and it cannot be healed, From this life he is loosing his shield, But he keeps up his pace, he opens the door, He wants to move forward but he is unsure, He tries to dream through this nightmare in his mind, He tries to question his life but sees a blank in time, The beat thumps in the background, from his eyes he sheds a tear, Time is finally up, he knows the last few hours are near, He is tired of waiting for the silence to be broken, He is constantly waiting for the pain to be token, His life is finally fulfilled, the black cloud clears, In a blink of an eye his name he can finally hear ......

Hallway Conversation

i was talking to this girl the other day, she looked at me asked r u wat they say, m like wat u mean by that ma, i am wat i am, she's like well r u really an african, yeh i lived there all my life, m not like these guys, i know how to treat a lady, if u were wondering why, she looked at me and gave me a smile, shes like i hope so cuz i not been treated good in a while, then her phone rings, nd she seems upset, she like my ex bf, i ainte heard nuff of him yet, well u need to be happy, take them troubles away, fact u need to move on, turn the other way, i move closer nd she rushes to hug me, then she's like thank you for understanding me, its no problem, im everyones big brother, then shes like yeh, u def different from the others, m like yeh but at this time m still single lady, shes like r u serious, i know u driving them girls crazy, m like you really think so, i mean i think i do, she winks at me, shes like don't worry you do, you make me laugh when we just talking, you don't try to hard, see them other guys be stalking, you show that you care, you give a helping hand, these guys here, all the time they don't give a damm, m like well thank you, i was taught to treat a women like a lady, shes like yeh, nd u never know, maybe, maybe tomaro there be a girl knocking at your door, or maybe your phone will ring when you at the store, shes like if i had the chance, i know wat i wud do, but she says at the moment its too much to go through, i know wat u mean ma, i feel wat u saying, i understand your pain when these guys be playing, making you think you more when you really not, don't worry my mind been played with, you gotta tell em to stop, she like yeh i know, ill keep it in mind, nd i was like oh nd a girl like you, you a unique find, shes like aaw, ill keep that in mind to, nd then wit a smile, i say you know i do wat i do,

Dream Girl

Lyrics for the Song "Dream Girl" on my page!!

I see this girl, she got her swagger right, As she walks by I see the stars of the night, so fly, she walks like a model, and that body, she got a shape of a bodle, can u u be my dream girl i need a girl who understands what m feeling, one who stands by me when no one listening, one who makes me smile when m having a bad day, one that can make the pain go away, a girl who appreciates me for being me, and doesn't agree with what others see, one i can hold on throughout the night, one that comes back when we have a fight, one that i dont need to spoil with fancy presents, cuz the girl be like a gift from heaven, one that i can tell my fears and not be afraid, one that when we talk, an instant smile is made, one that makes me have a good laugh, one that makes this feeling last, a girl who shows me that she really cares, me and her be the couple that people dont want to hear, I need a girl who gives me help when i need it, one that is like the air that m breathing, one that motivates me to keep moving on, and one that smiles when i write her a song, one that isn't jealous at these other girls, a girl that can be my whole world, one that comforts me when m sad, and one that will calm me down when m mad, one that tells me she misses me when m away, one that i cant wait to see everyday, one that disregards what they be saying, and one that laughs when we be playing, one that knows when something is wrong, one i can go to when the day is long, a girl i can stare at when she is sleeping, and when we laying there, me she be heating,

Poetic Speaking

my mind is weak, its tired within, dreams become real, they come to stand, visions appear on every last breath, look to the air and take my last step, the earth cracking beneath my feet, enemies encountered, put them to sleep, feels as if my perceptions are blind, an insight into my lifes greatest find, dont know what will come to pass, my confusions will come to last, colors mixing in and out in the skies, i see my truths circling my lies, the light is fading, the dark appears, a recurring thot hiden in my fears, the rain is pouring over the sand, the surface arrise with the son of man, clenching my fists as a prepare for war, the dark eyes are glistening with stars, defeat is a realization, a loss of me, looking out to sea, as far as i can see, years become days, minutes are lost, every moment is weak, innocence is fought, see the peaks of my lifes mountains, disregarding the path, the view blends, my name, untitled to see no more, listen to the wind rumble the core of the floor, nightmares scaring my ambitions away, wake to sunrise, the begining of the next day, working for a change, an illusion of faith, waiting for my actions to take place, the glass disolves as it hits the ground, the ripples creeping without a sound, the top of the game, the bottom of the map, gotta be careful, cant fall into a trap, the world keeps moving around the sun, global warming, a theory that may come, revenge seeping through youths mind, the uncaring stand still and see the signs, the night still moves on flawlessly, in the day, the shadows keep following me, the air is frigid, the winds whispers, mother nature is gone, the trees miss her, stare into the hole of wisdom, wat do i see, i see the tears droping among the weak, the glory of the hatred, the tiredness of man, the rising of justice among the dammed, stories being told as the paper is burned, the heat of the flame, the fire is learnt, holding on to pride, a end is nearing, the fate of mankind is wat they are hearing,