The Masonics - a winning combination of Milkshakes, Pop Rivets,
Wildebeests, Kaisers, film editors, Micky & Ludellas, Vectors,
Headcoats, commercial artists, Kravin "A"s, Auntie Vegetables and
landscape gardeners. (Not bad, seeing as there's only three of 'em.)
THE MASONICS ARE...
MICK 'THE MILK' HAMPSHIRE: singing & 6-string guitar
BRUCE 'BASH' BRAND: traps & backing vocals
JOHN 'LARDY' GIBBS: bottom guitar & backing vocals
(with thanks to former bass-jockeys: Johnny Barker, Johnny Johnson & Liam Watson)
Having attended the same secret lodge - the Omnipotent Order of
Eccentric Rapscallions (OOER) - together for 25-odd years, our three heroes were united in their cause when they were elected to search the UK for a sacrificial virgin to be deflowered at the sacred
Dodecacentenial Orgy (or 'DO' for short).
A 16-year search - during which Micky was mistakenly assumed to be missing, presumed unable to take the pace - yielded nothing. In short, they had no joy, neither on their home turf nor during a brief sojourn to western Europe. (Hence their anticipated presence in the Promised Land).
To lure their prey they hit on the ingenious plan of disguising
themselves as a musical 'rock-group' (presently very popular among young folk we are led to believe).
Therefore, we urge all parents, siblings, friends, acquaintances and cohorts of any known (or not) unblemished no-tails, (irrespective of age, race, creed, cooking-ability etc.) to attend the soon to be announced Masonic gatherings, accompanied by same.
Your assistance in this matter is greatly appreciated.
Note: We would like to thank ourselves for allowing whippersnapper colonial upstarts The Wh*te Str*pes to close a series of performances for us in the early part of this century, during their maiden voyage to This Great Country Of Ours. (Crumbs! etc.)
THE MASONICS (Hangman) 1991
SILENTLY BY NIGHT (Little Teddy Recordings) 1998
DOWN AMONG THE DEAD MEN (Sympathy for the Record Industry) 1998
THE MASONIC MACHINE TURNS ON YOU! (Vinyl Japan) 2003
LIVE IN LONDON (SmartGuy) 2004
OUTSIDE, LOOKING IN (Vinyl Japan) 2005
ROYAL & ANCIENT (Circle Records) 2007
FROM THE TEMPLE VAULTS (Grand Wazeau) 2009
New compilation album of top tunes plus one previously unreleased track OUT NOW. Available as Long-Playing Record Album only!
SINGLES & EPs:
Empty Shell Of A Man/You Just Dont Care/Tell That To A Hungry Man/Why Did She Have To Go (Wonderlamp) 1994
In A Mans Heart/Hey Calinda / She Cut Me To The Bone (Royal Records) 1995
Mumbo Jumbo/Good Or BadDont Complain/Creature Called Doubt (Little Teddy) 1995
The Earl Of Hell/Upside Down Man / Never So Sad (Super-Electro) 1997
Skull Of A Man (featuring Miss Ludella Black) (SmartGuy) 2004
When You Cry At Night / Where's Johnny Moped Now? (Slovenly 702-58) 2006
Sometimes Friend (feat. Ludella Black) / Hungry Monkey (Circle CPW S104) 2009