I grew up in a family that always loved me the best that they could and give me all that I needed, however by the age of 8 years old after a traumatic back yard accident, I began the process of becoming a broken, dishonest, and lost person . Seeking acceptance and attention through sports and cracking jokes, eventually as a teen, I turned to drugs, alcohol, porn, food, and music and to fill the void inside me. Consequences included stays at three mental/behavioral Hospitals and two rehabs for drug and alcohol abuse at the age of 16, sentenced to 12-step group attendance as well as weekend stay in juvenile detention as well as two weekend in Jones home shelter mostly due to my own inability to stay sober . At age 17 I turned to music. I thought that being in a band, could possibly music could possibly redeem myself and prove to the world that I could be someone “important”.
At age 19 my good friend and band mate Marty was diagnosed with Brain cancer. Over the next year as his disease progressed so did my disease of alcoholism. but when Marty passed away I felt more like a ghost than a living person. Shortly after, a friend of mine and Marty’s invited me to go to “meetings “with him. I went, but continued to drink and drug (mostly marijuana) to cope. After a short stay in a mental health hospital, a doctor asked me if I thought I may be an alcoholic and challenged me to not drink for 90 days. Later that night at my friend’s apartment, I drank, realizing I had already broken my commitment. That night I had a moment of clarity and said ‘im Done”. The next day I tried smoking pot , but it no longer worked, it just made things worse. 3/11/2005
From that point on, I became free from drugs and alcohol and made a commitment to sobriety. Around that time my Grandma had taken me in and welcomed me to stay with her as long as I stayed sober and went to scheduled doctor/counseling appointments. At approximately 6 months “clean” struggling with depression I had the opportunity to go on a weekend trip to help move my grandpa ( diagnosed with terminal cancer) back to the Cleveland area to be with family. I was encouraged by my grandfathers strength in such a weak state and by my cousins encouragement to pursue the gift of music God had given me. Shortly after returning, I went to Church (lady of Guadalupe) with my grandma and was introduced to a men’s discipleship group and had my first experience with group prayer and the healing presence of God. However holding onto my own beliefs, and philosophies I left the group but continued to go to meetings’ , while working at a pizza shop and dived deeper into my dream of doing music and being “big’ in the music biz.
After a couple months my roommate/band mate expressed I could no longer live with him. I began to stay with a friend/mentor while working on a project together. While attending a” meeting “I was befriended by a guy who ended up being a childhood friend of the friend I was staying with and invited both to CVC and 707 Church services. 707 was the first place that I had ever been that quenched a yearning in my soul for something more than my own ideas and dreams, where I started to really believe that Jesus was real while hearing a missionary speaker from Thailand. However still driven by my own goals and aspirations I sporadically attended and eventually fell into a deep depression.
Shortly after turning it over to God as I understood him at the time, I attended a tetelestai (passion for Christ/gospel style) play during lent. Afterwards during a meet and greet with the actors while still dressed in character., while writing out prayer requests and in tears, a woman directed me to one of the men who played Jesus’ apostles/disciples from the play. I confessed to him how I had been holding onto my own ways, beliefs and philosophies, but now wanted to accept Jesus as he is and how I had just saw him. He told me as it was told to him “ Today is your day”.
I then began to attend 707 at CVC regularly joined a life group, entered a Christian battle of the bands (and won) with the family I now stay with, that accepted me into their home and invited me to the church they are active in where soon after I began to play drums apart of their worship arts team.
Still far from perfect, at times making poor choices and not listening to Gods voice/calling , fell into bouts of depression as much as one year (3/2010-3/2011) . However through it all God has remained faithful , even though I had become faithless and consumed by sin, lovingly accepting me back a part of his body in community, to bear good fruit for his glory and be pruned into the man he has called me to become, “souled out for Jesus!”
After returning from a missions trip in Nashville (floods of 2010) it became clear to me that Music is apart of my calling and broken dreams were mended. I'm not called to condemn but am called to create w/out compromise,building bridges, promoting a relationship not a Religion. what does it sound like....Reggae, Rock, Funk, Hip Hop blended in a way that you would want your smoothie...Organic, Fresh & good for the soul