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JReal aka Dickward Codgers (born sometime between 30 years ago and now) is an American rap legend. Dickward is best known for being the realest motherfucker in the planet. Dickward started rapping 3 hours and 17 minutes ago, and during that time has achieved lyrical genius.
Dickward was born on the streets of Dallas, TX to a one legged prostitute known in the streets as Stumps. Stumps had a tough time raising Dickward due to an addiction to crack, meth, coke, heroin, whippets, mescaline, Valium, opium, morphine, cheese, special K, acid, rat poop and has since graduated to bath salts. Dickwards father is a high powered criminal defense attorney in Dallas, but hasn't seen Dickward since he was 24 minutes old. Stumps would eventually trade Dickward to a schizophrenic midget named Connie Codgers and her donkey for the residue in a coke baggie. " I just needed a taste" was her explanation. The donkey would be Dickwards primary caretaker until Dickward was 9 and decided it was time to set out on his own.
Dickward began selling coke, escstasy pills and knock off Nike socks to Park Cities high schoolers and SMU students and athletes. Dickward also started a foundation for young women to make extra money, by providing services to wealthy Doctors and Lawyers in exchange for money and gifts. Many criticized the foundation calling a prostitution ring, but Dickward denied the allegations. "we are creating opportunities for men and women by spreading love and harmony through the community, don't ever call my hoes whores" Dickward only smacks the hoes when they get out of line, he doesnt believe in violence. Dickward didn't like to partake in the drugs with his clients, but usually always did. Dickward is well loved in the Park Cities community and even has a street named after him, Dickward Way. Dickward has gone on to father many illegitimate children, "I like kids, I just don't like them standing next to me"
Dickward is like the sun, don't look directly at him. Dickward wears socks sometimes. Dickward has wristbands, flyers and shirts. Chuck Norris wears Dick Codgers wristbands. Dickward has more than likely fornicated with your mom, sister or both. Dickward has Jesus cellphone number, and frequently collaborates with him and Tupac on mixtapes that are dropped exclusively in heaven. Dickward is better than you, at everything. Dickward doesn't know his birthday, so celebrates everyday as his birthday. Dickward sometimes saves kittens and shit. Dickward wrote a book. Dickward will never live up to Dickwards expectations. No one is worthy of Dickwards presence, not even Dickward. Dickward has not collaborated with any artists, for obvious reasons. Dickward has soft spot for the homeless, but doesn't like them. Dickward didn't vote for Obama, so don't blame him.
Dickward started rapping as a means to purchase better drugs and afford prostitutes that don't have AIDS. In early March of 2012 Dickward released his critically acclaimed EP "Fuk Off" under his alias JReal, including the hit singles "Woodstick" and "The Man". Both videos have created a buzz on YouTube. Be on the lookout for his upcoming album "Mr. Codgers Neighborhood" which will be available whenever the fuck he feels like it.