Tommy Lee Portafoy © (5.24.12)
by Randy Lee, Brad Lee, Terri Lee & Matt Lee
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Shotgun, a pistol and a bowie knife
Fourth grade education, lives a simple life
Up high on the hill, on the ridge
With his pretty wife an’ ‘bout fourteen kids
And they do fine
What they don’t shoot they grow
And they always have plenty of food
Uh Hugh

Tommie Lee Portafoy
He is a country boy
And you don’t want to mess with his kin
Or it may be the last thing you do
But he could be a damn good friend to you too

Happened fast, he couldn’t comprehend
Air Brakes screeched as he rounded the bend
Breasts pressed against the glass
As the big truck passed
She fought to escape, screaming rape
Beautiful blonde was paralyzed
Inside her Six Fifty Eye (650i)
Tommy Lee decided right then and there
No woman oughta Be treated that way
There’s no better day than this day
To send that bastard to his grave.
Uh Hugh

Tommie Lee Portafoy
He is a country boy
And you don’t want to mess with his kin
Or it may be the last thing you do
But he could be a damn good friend to you too

That No Count rapist took and ran
When he saw it was Tommie Lee
Had that black Dodge Ram
Up to bout hundred and three
Heard the big rig, but it was too late
Twelve tons of mean smashed his tailgate
Dodge spun and flipped, settled on its side
Portafoy yanked him from that ride
Before that gas tank was to burst
What Tommie Lee had planned
Would hurt him even worse
Uh Hugh

Tommie Lee Portafoy
He is a country boy
And you don’t want to mess with his kin
Or it may be the last thing you do
But he could be a damn good friend to you too

He wound up in the vat of a well-hidden still
Fuel for fire of Moonshiner Roger Bill
Turned out his life wasn’t a total waste
Prolly the only damn time
He did something in good taste
Meanwhile Portofoy’s version of resuscitation
Brought that pretty woman to a new realization
The air was still fragrant with her Channel # 5
When black-hearted boy ceased to be alive.
Them hills were the undoin of that hillbilly boy
Shorely wished he’d never messed with
The future Mrs Portafoy
Uh Hugh

They live up high on the hill on the ridge
His pretty wife, him an’ ‘bout fourteen kids
And they do fine…