We all need a place called Home The more I’m away the more I miss home. I’ve traveled the world in my mind. For many years I searched for something. A place and myself. I have met some of the most beautiful people in the world. I have love and lost along my way as we all have. I remember driving south down Princess Hwy. in Australia getting out and looking across the ocean in Eden NSW on Aisling Beach and feeling empty inside. I looked at a picture of the girl that said I love you and she did the best way she knew how. But I also realized she never knew the true meaning of those words. As I watched the sun come up that day across Blackwattle Bay I knew it would be the last time I would ever see her again. And as I watched her drive away in the distance, I looked at her one last time thru the back window of old bus 431 and whispered goodbye my love. Now I just want to turn back the hands of time, leave it all behind and go home. In the middle of Dixie where there are no fancy ways of saying hello without speaking it with a caring voice. A place where my feet as a boy walked on the earth. Where the southern sky reflects the sunlight off the morning dew. I want to go back where I can hear those old southern tunes being played around a campfire in the middle of the night. A place where you still hear respect with sirs and mams. When you hear that southern boys have big trucks and like to play in the mud and the southern women will fight beside their man. You damn skippy that’s true. I want to see the dark waters and the Cyprus knees on the banks of the Saint Johns river. I’m tired and just want to go home. Home is not just any place. It’s a place where you know you belong. Where you find peace with the morning sun on your face, and everything feels right from the inside out.
It was Dec 6th I will never forget that date. I saw a man at the waters edge of the ocean. When he left I walked down to the beach to see what he had written in the sand. There was a heart shaped in the sand with a note buried in the middle of it under a sea shell. And when I read it my heart broke. It Read: [The battle of life seemed easy until I meet you. I didn’t know what love was until I felt it inside because of you. And now without you the things that I can see have no meaning. But I have to complete my commitments and obligations that came before you. Because I know in time they will be more than you can bare and will only cause you sorrow. And that is more than I can bare. So as I finish out my journey in life, in my heart you Angel Face will always be the light in my hour of darkness. Let your beautiful smile shine on to others as it did for me. And if all I ever have is I love you’s then I do. ] And at the bottom was her name. And as I knelt their after reading his words I looked out across the ocean and realized only the loss of true love could bring a warrior of life to his knees. I thought of the girl and how she must have felt his sadness. And as I looked back I saw him looking out across the horizon, perhaps for the last time. Then he bowed his head, turned and faded into the sunrise. And at that moment I realized on that day he had put his mind to his heart, and pulled the trigger. I placed the note back under the shell where I found it and watched the end coming tide wash it all away. When I got home that night. I sat down on my piano, closed my eyes and with those words on my mind wrote the song ( Because You ). Love is the foundation of all mankind. We were created out of love. If one has truly ever found it, then they have found peace and contentment within. Some never know real love and think they can live without it. But their emptiness shines like a crown. Some have found it and lost it through the circumstances of life. But the wise cherish the time they had and remember like the man by the waters edge that day.
The howl of the lone wolf on a distant mountain looking down below only to see the things in which he can not have, yet his lonely sound is heard around the world upon ears that cannot hear. So he wanders in silence. The master of his domain that is rarely seen but often spoken of. A domain where legends of valor are written. A place where the strongest of the strong dwell..yet walk alone. A place where a tear is seldom found but when it falls it quacks the ground. A place where the thunder of love is but a whisper and is above all sounds. Where two hearts search the night in vain looking in others for what they had lost when they were as one.
I tried to put the thoughts behind me and move forward, and now all I find myself always looking back. I close my eyes in the darkness to forget and that's when I see the clearest. I feel your presence and your closeness... and you fading away all at the same time
It’s always amazing how happiness and joy makes a person glow that others can see. The confidence that shows on their face. But I think what amazes me the most is how it affects others. It’s contagious to be happy. I have a friend in Cairns that every picture you see of her she has a great big beautiful smile on her face. I also have a dear friend that is very wealthy and I asked him what the reason was that he didn’t like to come home to his house. He said it’s the loneliness place on earth. Some people say I don’t need anyone to make me happy. That statement always reminds me of the bible. Adam owned the world and what good was it if he had no one to share it with. If you think you are happy now, just wait until you find that special someone to share it with. You will be invincible to the things you can’t see. With the shield of true love, the two are one, and cannot be broken by the things of this world.
Don’t Forget A little boy growing up would watch his dad each day go to the window and pray. He never really knew what his dad was praying about, so after many years he asks his mom about it. She told him that when he was a young man he went to war and when he got back he started this Morning Prayer. She told her son that she had never really asked him what he was praying about. She figured it had something to do with his time as a soldier. So one day the man’s son got up early one morning and after his dad had finished praying. He ask him what it was all about. His dad with gentle eyes looked at his son and said, I made a promise when I was a young soldier to another soldier. And because of that soldier is the reason you are here. The son asked his dad, “What did the soldier do that was so important”? So the dad told his son I am going to tell you the story so you will understand valor, honor, and love. When I was a soldier we had to go to war. The fighting was brutal. The nights seem to come alive. I always would tell myself to be strong and kept reminding myself what we were fighting for. One night we got caught behind enemy lines. Bullets and rockets were flashing all around me. I had never seen such fearse fighting. I remember I was in a fox hole and another soldier was with me that I had never seen before. He never said a word. He had scares on his face and arms from previous battles and I could see he had no fear and was willing to die without hesitation. Off in the distance was our company but the enemy were between us and them and moving towards me and the other man. I took out a picture of your mom that I carried with me and was in my own way telling her goodbye. As the old soldier looked at me and I could see the reflections of the scares on his face as he began to speak. And in a deep rough voice he said, who is that in the picture. I wanted to make like I too was not afraid but he saw right through me. I told him it was my wife. He looked back at the enemy approaching and said to me there is only one way that you will ever see her again. I will have to stay here and hold them off long enough for you to get back across the lines. I didn’t know what to say and I think he knew that to. He looked at me and said I don’t have anyone. I am the last of my family name. But I asked you this, each morning when the sun rises remember me and the sacrifice so I won’t be forgotten. And with that he turned back toward the enemy and said don’t forget. I went back to get help I could hear heavy gun fire behind me that seemed to last forever. And then it was silent. When I got back at dawn with help, it was an unbelievable sight. Bodies were lying around the old soldier everywhere. I knelt down beside his lifeless body and said I will never forget. As long as someone remembers… you will live forever.
They tell me the sun rose today, but I didn’t see it. The beauty of the morning sun was because your smile being in it. And when I woke up this morning, I realized you were gone when I looked to my left side where you use to lay your head, and where you would take your hair and tickle my nose. Where I could look over at you in the night and look upon your eyes while you were at peaceful sleep. This morning when I looked all I saw was your picture opened up on my phone. I never thought a day would come in my life that you wouldn't be in it.
When you love someone, that person makes you feel alive. You never have to think of anyone else because all you ever wanted or needed is in front of you. With the touch of their lips you can feel the world go away. In some spiritual way you can feel each other’s thoughts and feelings. Time and distance and all the obstacles and challenges of this world can’t separate the bonding of the two hearts. The closest I have ever been to unconditional love was when I was on my knees in the middle of a plowed corn field looking for the source. I found it that day many years ago and have never looked back or had any doubts again. And because of that day on my knees, and when I found you, I knew what love really was and I knew you would be the one true love in my life always and forever.
It’s you voice I hear in my dreams, as it has always been. And your touch on my spirit that calls my name in the night. It’s your hair that I see blowing in the distance, that I long to touch again. And it’s your heart that nurtures my heart when I feel alone…. and yet I don’t even believe you are aware of it. It has been you from the beginning. It’s you that my eyes search for in others to try and survive. And on that day and that moment when I laid my heart in your hands. I whispered to you be careful my love, for to you I freely give the only thing that will ever matter in this life….my heart. It will only beat with your love to nurture it. So if you go, lay it down softly for it will be no more. Because the heart of a person is the person. And you will spend your days seeking the one thing that mattered. A heart filled with love, like the one you let go of so long ago. And you will remember as you watch your tears hit the floor.
I woke up the other morning… made my coffee and started reading. I read a story about a man who believed his strength was in the length of his hair. It was full of adventure and I couldn’t put it down. He eventually fell in love and told the one he loved his secret. Well most people know how it ended. But as I laid the book down it a cured to me that his strength was not in his hair but in his obedience and his weakness was in his disobedience. I started to think how his spirit must have died when he found out the one he loved and trusted so much betrayed him. It reminded me of a time when I was a young man and my grand-dad a (WWII veteran) for many years had been teaching me self-defense. One morning while he was on the back porch watching the sun rise, drinking his coffee and smoking his Camel cigarettes. He turned and looked at me and said, “I can only teach you how to defend yourself against things that you can see. That will be easy. It’s the things that you can’t see that will try and over take your life like anxiety, lost love, fear, loneliness, and many others… and there is only one way to get through these challenges and that’s with the armor of life, and that comes with obedience. Fortunately I finally figured it out. Took me a few years. I sat down at my piano as I often do each morning and started playing. A melody came without thought, and words began to feel my mind. I couldn’t write them down fast enough it seemed. And when I stopped and read what I had written… I bowed my head in a humble position. It read “I’ll take your place, when they nailed him to the cross it all got erased, he said I’ll take your place, and that picture your mother showed you of footprints in the sand. That was me taking your place and holding your hand.” …. Saved by Love, tears, and Grace and because of love… I’ll take your place.