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HSB (HIPPIE SPEEDBALL) / Blog

HSB News You Can Trust

OK, my last news article was completely fictitious...or was it? What I'm about to tell you is factual and verifiable from your browser of choice but it somehow fits right into my previous blog about the increasingly detectable decline in human intelligence. BERGHOLZ, OH - Apparently, and to the best of my knowledge, the FBI arrested 7 men that were members of, and I quote, "a breakaway Amish group". The arrests were made after these men were accused of what is referred to as "hair-cutting attacks" on Amish men & women and they are being charged with committing a hate crime. "Cutting the hair is a highly offensive act to the Amish, who believe the Bible instructs women to let their hair grow long and men to grow beards and stop shaving once they marry." Now this is rural Ohio, and we've heard about the FBI making mistakes before, but this is a unique case and here's where I had to slap myself to make sure I wasn't dreaming this up. This is not a joke nor is it fictitious..."Among those arrested were the group's leader, Sam Mullet, and three of his sons, said Mike Tobin, a spokesman for the U.S. attorney's office in Cleveland." I am completely lost for words! reported by Stil Bil, 11/23/11

HSB News You Can Trust

It has been determined by a leading team of research scientists from the US that human beings are indeed getting less intelligent. When the team was asked where these conclusions were drawn from, the teams leading researcher, Dr. Phil McCracken responded quickly saying, "What? I am sorry, I was not listening." Need we say more?