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AGGRESSOR / Blog

STARING DOWN THE EAST 2011 TOUR BLOG pt. 2

Saturday, January 15, 2011 - HALIFAX @ CLUB 1668 Hellifax Hellacaust....hell...we had a good time! GRAHAM GRAHAM GRAHAM!!!!!! :D We owe you our lives and ten tons of foreign reach around techniques to thank you for your hospitality. Muthafucka made us soup and we watched the original Texas Chainsaw Massacre. Once again as no small reminder of a time in frenchbuttfucktown long ago...we played right next to a Chinese Food restaurant. Fuck eatin there though. We loaded in, loaded up and I swear by the time everyone had taken a shit 3 out of 4 shitbuckets at the venue were clogged. God damn Tommy Huts he done it again! Napalm Raid...now there is a band you MUST check out! Fast and heavy as FUCK! Violent, and for fans of any kind of drug or hooker killing ambitions. This band is like a visual abortion - shit!!!! Great band! Jen as well, thank you for the soup and hospitality. You're really cute. BACK TO THE SHOW! The guys went up, did they thaaaang, and fuckin rocked hard, gave it their all and didn't give a fuck. Last song rolls around...its 2AM and the lights in the venue come on. Show's over? FUCK NO!!!! The guys played two extra covers to the crowds demand. first their none more black cover of Cold Sweat and then...DUHN DUHN DUUUUUUUUUHHHHHH!!!! After the microphones were shut off and the lights on to signify the end of the evening, Brian announced....fuck that....LOVE GUN! Our loyal compadre Diddy-K-Diddler grabbed a guitar and with no sounds coming through the P.A. the crowds voices rung higher and louder than any Manowar or James Taylor concert. With barely audible drums, loud-as-fuck guitars...the crowd overpowered all of this combined...with their loud muthafuckin mugs!!!! THANK YOU HALIFAX!!!! You have made this trip truly worth every second of Tim Tom inflicted anal guaging conditioning experiences worth it. We love you all... Capn R.M.

Sunday, January 16, 2011 - QUEBEC CITY @ SCANNER BISTRO HEY THERE KIDS....gather round. It's story time. The guys from AGGRESSOR ventured into a strange land where people talked real funny and didn't know how to enjoy shows because in this strange place, smiling is un-cool and not allowed. There were however a few badass people who got the pit rolling on a wonderful, brisk Sunday evening and did enjoy themselves. This place was called Quebec City. It's a fortified city that protects the inhabitants from the rest of the vast Canadian wasteland out there. The guys from AGGRESSOR liked this strange and unusual place. They all said to each other "Golly mon gars, lets come on back here and fuckin play un esti de show encore". After they had a fun time wailing away to a few dozen people from this strange land, they went off to a much more familiar place; a place they had been before but didn't recall how upsetting it was to their fragile little colons. This magical place was called Chez Ashton, and boy did it suck...well not fully. There the boys from AGGRESSOR ate a very different kind of meal called a "Poutine" and golly did they enjoy the fuck out it. Well....I guess it's bedtime now kids....oh what's that?!?!?! How did the story end??? Oh well....silly billy....of course the story ended on a happy note. The guys all fell asleep after our French feast except for poor Cap'n Goldust and Diddy...haha...Goldust had to stay awake and drive overnight all while avoiding hitting more deer with the guys' trailer. Diddy's constant exhalation of smoke was no help to Goldust keeping a clear head and staying awake. Many Red Bulls ensued. Anyway, goodnight. And remember if you masturbate into a sock...it'll save you one hassle of a clean up. Until next time, goodbye. Your dear pal, Capn Rod Munsch

STARING DOWN THE EAST 2011 TOUR BLOG pt. 1

Wednesday, January 12, 2011 - MONTREAL @ PIRANHA BAR HELLO MY FELLOW PUSSY FUCKERS AND COCKSUCKERS (ladies and gents), Great to see you reading this shit speckled white middle class american crap again... poor bastards...thank you! We were late to Montreal, after all meeting up at the crossroads of The Silver Dollar grease and tits joint. We arrived, ate some Za Za party pies and played with some bands. Brian's friend Christine showed up and they uh...hung out......the little fuck. Brian's troubles kept on cummin', he A) broke the driver Dusty's glasses, laptop, headphones, and raised his allergies to Cologne by a ten fold causing his groin to swell. and... B) made them late leaving because of cockal reasons....bullshit 2 and a half minute wait Brian...good job. We all ended up heading out after a nice McDonalds meal, shittin our pants and sweat droppin from deez nuts. GOODNIGHT!

Thursday, January 13, 2011 - MONCTON @ THE PARAMOUNT I swear to the high mighty lord Capn' Tugz we aint here to play music but to try and taste test pizza from all across Canada. The road to Moncton was fair, and the smell wasn't TOO bad. Dusty's trailer parking skills have improved ten fold. Backing up into small alleyways like a pedophile enters small caverns is no problem for the Goldust Driver. The show was hella wicked tubular awesome cool metal dude, especially for the young baby Wolves. The little 12 year old shit was crowdsurfed by a 19+ crowd fondling his junk like a good rub-n-tug (wear a condom Brett!). The crowd was fuckin hot rokken and as always...the AGGRESSOR boys had a killer fuckin time with out east folks and their 3 buck-a-pint way of life. BUT ANYWAYS back to the pizza. We saw our good friend Kyle from Cop Shades and he recommended the poutine pizza party special. So as a Maritimer do, he bought us a pie to try...and so we ate, we shit and we laughed about it. Hella good pizza though....OH and uh....Bong Jovi.....check em out cool dudes with some rad tunes! til next time.... Rod.

Friday, January 14, 2011 - FREDERICTON @ NICKY ZEE'S We pulled into Fredericton backtracking from Moncton. good shit EH?!! Once again we owe huge to Moma Wolves for her unrelenting hospitality and love. You're the best Mom! As far as the show.....holy fuck!!!!!!!! FREDERICTON RULES!!! We always thoroughly enjoy playing here and jerking in the washrooms cause everyone is so damn polite and clean. Everyone in the band got thoroughly and royally smashed and hammered eh bud! And well...I can't remember too too much. All I know right now is Fredericton has been THE BEST show so far. The boys did well in merch sales and the crowd loved the show...we can only hope! But all in all this was a show no man could shake their dick at. The guys rolled in with the lovely Ashley of Undergound Operations and their good friend Scotty (giv'r Jimmy!) and had one fuckin hell of a time ragin til the morning came! :) Bedtime and dreams of Halifax and big titted barmaids to ensue...goodnight World...please send me a wet dream. Raddy Rad Rod Ra Ra Rod Rod

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