I am working on the lyrics for now I have this:

Have you seen crowd crucifying Jesus
Praying to the God for success in that business
Are they the same as many years ago?
Or maybe they’ve changed – I guess you know
 

This crowd consits of you and me
Without sin we cannot be

So tell me what all this sufferings are for
And if there is reason to carry on

There must be any sense in leaving
There must be any sense in death
How can you get it without seeking
For something that you’ll never have

The point is that most of our time we are rejecting the God. We are after everything in our lives but belief. Most of people only know what is written in Bible and what we must do. But we only know this and in most cases we are not following. That’s why first question “Have you seen crowd crucifying Jesus, praying to the God for success in this business?” can be addressed to anyone of us. In this song I am not mentioning those people about 2000 years ago in Jerusalem but at the same time this can be addresses to them as well. That’s why “Are they the same as many years ago?” is in the song. Have we changed in general. Those who have crucified Jesus believed they were defending their religion and their God. Isn’t it the same now? We have our “religions” and “gods” – and we do not care about wisdom that is given in Bible. We simply have no time for this. But maybe I am wrong saying this? Anyway I only raise questions.

It seems that we are not learning. Jesus suffered and we treat His sufferings as a gift, as our salvation. But it is “credit” that must be paid back. Paid with love, care, forgiveness and etc. For many of us these are only words nothing else. For us it is very heard to forgive – to love our enemy – almost impossible, and let’s talk about people who we love. Very often we cannot forgive them. So tell me what all this sufferings are for, and if there is reason to carry on? After all this – is there is reason to carry on? Carry on what? As for me – two sides of a coin – yes and no at the same time. Yes we have to carry on with all our weakness, mistakes and etc. As one day we shall not just realize, but feel. No – the earlier we stop the better it is for our souls.

Actually there are two persons talking with each other.

And the second states that there is sense in everything – in life in death in getting in loosing in smiling in moaning. And about sense – “How can you get it without seeking for something that you’ll never have”. It does not mean something that one will never have (it depends on person – whether it is love, peace of mind, happiness, justice, or money – anything he dreams about) because only God knows will it be given or not. People in most cases are very eager to give up when talking about something that they want, but they believe are almost impossible to have. When someone feels that he will never have lets say justice and gives up in finding it, he will find nothing in the end. Only those are blessed, who dare to continue the way they want to go, in spite of their disbelief, fear, doubt. Maybe in the end they will not get what they were after, but they will have something more valuable.

*****************************************************************************************************************

MY DEBUT ALBUM
CATHARSIS GALLERY
These songs and messages are for an abstract person and are related to him

 

A man without a dream has no chance to live and is doomed to existence. It is always easer to surrender and to adopt to reality, rather than continue whilst loosing parts of you life. A dream that makes you feel that you are special, because your dream is special. It is only yours, only your dream makes things different, makes you confident, eager. And suddenly it becomes your obsession, your idol. If something goes wrong - it is the world that must be changed, as it is not as perfect as your dream and you cannot live without your dream. It was not you who chose what your dream would be - your dream had chosen you and it will never set you free. You say to people who are close to you that there is no way for you to live life the way that they do. They cannot teach you and you cannot teach them - you all are so different. For them life is what they have, for you - what you must have. But your problem is that you want control your life to fulfill your dream and to do this you'd better know what the world is. And on the other hand the faster you get what you need the faster you loose something that you'd better keep and take care of it. Maybe just simply live and find happiness inside and not around?
SONGS - HOW MANY TIMES - YET I CANNOT BE - WAIT

 

You are obsessed with your dream and now it is not like your dream leads you thru the gallery of life. Your dream posses and devours you. You are slowly becoming its feeble and cloying slave, ready to do anything to complete your "mission". But your dream more often looks more like mirage. You use and threw away what is around you and for you. Of course you will pay back with more love and light when you will come to your destination. But love is leaking from your soul and you plans, thoughts, combinations of possibilities you try to predict turns you into rusted machine that cannot function properly anymore. How can it? Its main task is mission and not living. Running out of love, forgiveness, humility, patience and wisdom. Know what? - life starts killing you.
SONG - LIFE STARTS KILLING YOU

 

Obsessed with your mission, with your dream, you can easily broke any rule and justify it with all profit that you will give away. It is only matter of time you say. But no trespass can be justified by good intentions. And your conscience will not leave you alone. Any form of obsession will lead do depression and failure. And there is no exception. The same happened to you and why you think you deserve help? Why you thing that it is punishment and not a test that is given to you to get wiser? You did not want good things only for you. But when chasing your dreams you act only out of your current interests and tasks. You say prayers but they are deserted by your pride and obsession. Why do you think that need of yours must be satisfied? Maybe the point is not satisfying your need but living with it? The more you have to loose the weaker you are, more dependent on all that you have. You are slowly loosing your freedom - the real power. And there will be no deal with your conscience. Convulsion of your obsession and pride will stop your existence - a chance to start living..
SONG - NO DEAL

 

Labyrinth of questions, answers, counter question and principles. Trade off and compromises you have to face in your life. How much to give? How much to take (and it is not about money, things, but love and freedom, care and punishing, attention and rejection, justice and forgiveness). In most cases you cannot pass through this without any losses and damages. But is it possible to keep everything you have in the beginning of the life while going through catharsis gallery of life? Maybe matters only how you will pass and not where you go?
SONG - LABYRINTH

 

When there is no way out to peace and happiness, the only way seems right – down. Into the darkness where is no temptation of the light that might e just illusion, where you ca shoot the sun down that gives you hope so fragile. Turn your sole off to feel no pain. No dream, no wish no desire – sleepy wilderness of brain. The less you need the less you know, the more happy you are. Such wilderness will never be sleepy and peaceful - one day it will turn into storm and the light wont give away any of its part to the darkness. Light is energy, dynamics, life. Darkness – is not. And there is no place you can hide from the light. In the end we all came back to the confession, but what we shall see then? The further we go the closer we are to ....
SONG - MAN AND TIME

 

It is not the point whether we die or not. Does not matter how we die. Matters only what we shall have after leaving this world. For the nature - winter is death, with spring coming after and the nature renewed. Evening is before darkness falls. Time to remember the word that had not been said, song that had not been sung, summer of her eyes that came back. Winter and evening of your life. And life around goes on - ships will pass the storm, the storm will never find his home, and lazy stone won't even have a glance. But all this is like counterfeit illusion when you feel, getting closer to the end, that life is just beginning and light of candle means more than cold darkness outside. As only soul remains above everything that is temporary.
SONG - WINTER EVENING

 

Slowly but forward, not in a rush. Losses are only price to pay. Shadows of the past lead to the light of tomorrow. Destination - freedom of love. This world is not our home just part of our souls. And the soul must sing freedom. Life is not feeding you body or satisfying yourself. Life must be catharsis. And everything else that has any progress in other direction is regression.
SONG - THE WAY (through catharsis gallery)

 

Waiter to bring you on a dish your life that you have to taste to understand, some poison of your abuse to drink. Will it overwhelm you? Barman to listen to you and to show that you have missed and what achieved. All this in your last whiskey bar in your life between the earth of your flesh and sky of your freedom. What is next? Gates or doors?
SONG - IN THE BAR