What can I say about Stoney..... Well he is still here.......still occupying a space on this crusty rock...... He was born (Found) just outside of a small Norfolk village called Little Choking that clings stubbornly to the east coast of not so merry England and he went to school, on days he couldn't avoid it, where he soon became inseparably acquainted with his two life long companions and advisers Roger and Trevor. His reluctance for full time education at the "Farming Academy of Village Life" went largely unnoticed mainly due to him being gifted with a photographic memory...only later did it become painfully obvious that every shot was more than a little out of focus.
His path in life took a dramatic turn when he arrived at school rather late as usual on what turned out to be Career Day. This day only happens once in a Norfolk student’s academic life...it is THE MOST important day...and Stoney missed it.......well nearly.
There were only two jobs left on offer when he arrived and the choice was what could be termed a "No Brainer"....which was handy really…. The first unmissable career opportunity was "Village Frog Catcher" a position that had unexpectedly become available when the last owner had suddenly forgotten how to swim and promptly drowned in the village pond...not an easy thing to do as it was never more than 6 inches deep even in mid winter due to all the supermarket trolleys that tended to accumulate at it's center.This was a mystery in itself as the nearest supermarket was more than a days ride away even for a high performance donkey. There was a rumour that the unfortunate event was drink related... but a statement by Eddy Soak the landlord of "The Twice Strangled Ferret" and best friend of the deceased soon put that to rest.
His chosen career however was ....