Well it all started back in the day when Santa was visiting the mall in Michigan. The Michigan Mall, I think. You see, back then Santa used to have elves accompany him while traveling. After all, do you really think it's Santa that feeds the reindeer and cleans up after them? Ew.
Anyways, I'm Robby The Elf, half elf on my mama's side, Eva Elf. My dad, Bobby Becker, one fly guy local dude, saw my mom and it was love at first sight. And a little elf magic too. Yeah, Dad thought Mom's "the bomb". My mom stayed after Santa left at a small elf colony called The North Side, located on the north side, of the south side, of Michigan. My parents fell in love and got married. Then I was born. Mom said I was so cute my face belonged on a stamp.
My mom taught me elf folklore and Dad taught me to shoot hoops. I have always enjoyed different genres of music and created Christmas Crunk. After saving Christmas myself, Santa wanted me to see what impact an elf could have thru music. I told him no one would believe me & he said, "You're telling me?!"
Now I'm an elf underground, beating the streets 'cause nobody's gonna give an elf a record deal just because he knows Santa. I've been recording music & living in the Upstate of South Carolina for a spell now. It's kinda cool and Santa has a house and some family nearby.
So I'm here to spell the message about the repression of elves. Ask Christmas retailers, "Where's the elf stuff?" My goal is to have everyone to hear my music so that someday, every child will one day, each Christmas Eve, also leave, a cookie, for an elf.
Robby The Elf, just Google it yo.